i hate events

been 2 damn nights that i dreamt about work, and colleagues. It's going to be such a fucking lousy weekend, because i am sure i will end up thinking about monday's event every minute. and my bosses have to sms me and say that because they don't think we know how to answer the queries that the people will have, we should direct all questions to them. If it's a freaking new programme, then why aren't you paying MORE attention to it and actually READ and think about the programme's details and processes weeks ago when the bloody draft was sent to you. it sucks. i hate programmes, i hate events.

and i cannot tell myself to not think about it at all because i have to, because i haven't thought about what i need to say on monday morning, and there are a million things that can go wrong, and probably will according to infamous murphy's law. i will be worrying about every single damn thing until it's over at 12nn. the adults, the students coming, the presentation, the questions, the networking, the application, the process after that, the things i need to sort out with the schools. sucks sucks sucks. i hate programmes, i hate events.

and why haven't the scores come in, it is encouraging me to procrastinate on the application that i am already dragging my feet on. now i am blaming it on the whole year. 2008 is a disappointing year. i don't think oct, nov and dec can salvage it, even though my favorite month and favorite holidays lies in the period. 2008 is disappointing. lost so many things and got so many sucky things. is it feng shui, is it karma. did i do something wrong?