everybody's special, but some people just matter more

shit shit shit. i dreamt last night, of running, with some people. don't know why but damn, the falling feeling is here again. SHIT. goddamit, just let me get over this. come'on, hold your fort, steady yourself, and deny and forget.

my gastric has been acting up lately, gone bonkers. no coffee & tea says the doctor. but that means that nothing is keeping me awake.

the stupid m-t-m session is 1 month away, and the venue, date - everything, is not sorted out. shit. it's the monday blues. i've got to go to work now. it totally defeats the purpose, but i've this morning off, but it's likely i will be working late tonight. laugh all you want, i lead an irrational life.