quality of performance today at db <- sucked

afterthought from watching Prison Break.  Credibility of "i promise", "trust me" is rare in harsh environments where it's 'each for his own' and competition for survival is intense.  But whichever case its rarity and fragility is what makes trust so precious.  Trust when broken, breaks into a million small pieces, hard to find, even harder to rebuild.  Yet, trust doesn't have to be that delicate.  People who are honest with each other, who understand and accept each other can build on the trust they have for each other day by day, bit by bit.  Harden it so that it doesn't quaver at the most trivial and paltry daily affairs.   But I suppose when there is real betrayal (however you qualify that) the trust goes down with it as well.

Of the feeling of needing to be in control, from Tyler Cowen's Discover your inner economist --

"...the more prominent the reward, the more likely it is to reduce the intrinsic motivation...  This is a major drawback of rewards and penalties.  We use them to influence the behaviour of other people.  And this is precisely what makes people feel a lack of control and and a lack of freedom.  Many people rebel against those feelings, or against the sources of those feelings, and that is why incentives can be so ineffective or perhaps even counterproductive."

Incentives and penalties (or threats) can only be counterproductive and ineffective when inappropriately applied.  Hence it is very important to identify correctly what is of value to the other party (not yourself).  A stake can have different value depending on the evaluator.  A $1million offer has a different value to a billionaire and a beggar.  A $1million offer can have different meaning to a billionaire depending on the context and situation.  Many times, you need to dig beyond the surface to see what are the links, feedback loops and inter-relations are between things.